changes

Achieve Your Own Personal Transformation

Big changes or small


People seem to want changes in their lives. They either want a new career, be able to lose weight, or simply accomplish something different than what they have done before. They want to go through some personal transformation. But is it even possible?

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Think about the number of times you have made New Year’s resolutions. Were any of them successful? Many people simply stop doing them because they know it’s an exercise in futility. Then, you have those who try over and over again to lose weight. They try one diet after another and after a few months gained most of the pounds back again.


Is there a secret?

On the other end of the spectrum are people who have overcome major obstacles and have thrived, never looking back from their new situations. Could some of us be wired differently than others?

Most people are capable of transforming their lives. If that weren’t true, you’d have way fewer success stories in the world. It depends on how badly people want to make changes. Sometimes, people simply aren’t ready for a change.

Other factors

Your environment also plays a huge role in determining success in implementing changes. Keeping yourself involved with negative-thinking people who discourage change makes it very difficult to succeed. If you truly want to transform, align yourself with people who want to help you succeed.

People are different. Some people can create transformations easily and without any help or encouragement from others. They have strong wills and keep going until the change becomes part of their lives. Others need help and encouragement.

Your background

Your upbringing is likely to be a factor in how well you adapt to change. If your parents preferred the status quo, you'd find it difficult to implement changes at first. Bear in mind, there are plenty of people who break away from the mold of their families and make changes in spite of their family backgrounds.

The best advice you should follow is never give up. If something doesn’t work out, try something else or look at the situation in a different way. Learn from your mistakes and failures and continue until you are where you want to be. Determination and persistence are your biggest allies when making your transformations. Never let anyone stand in your way of something you truly desire. Granted, it’s never easy. If it were, everyone would change easily and change would not be scary.

 

Resources can help you change


When you look to transform your life, having great resources helps you quickly accomplish this goal. Use the following references whenever you want to enact change.

Goodreads.com

Whether you are looking for a specific aspect of your life to transform or you simply want to learn more about the transformation process in general, look at Goodreads.com. While this website will often point you to Amazon and Kindle, it gives you further insight that may not be available directly on Amazon. It is a forum about books published on Amazon. You can get a better feel for which books to target. Of course, you should check out Amazon and other booksellers as well.

Trans 4 Mind

The tagline for this website is “Personal Development Resources”. The website itself does not contain much in the way of resources. It is more a catalog of books that are available (mostly from Amazon). The good news is they are not using affiliate links to make money from the recommendations. It is unclear whether they are using this website to endorse the authors. Still, it has value in seeing the various titles that are available in many facets of personal transformation. You can use this website as a starting point for other research. Source: http://trans4mind.com

Wikipedia.org

It’s usually not recommended to use Wikipedia.org directly as a source. However, one great aspect of Wikipedia is the resources that it links to at the end of each article. In many articles, the number of links are extensive and usually quite relevant. It is another great resource to use for your research.

Psychology Today

This website had several resources on transformation. Keep in mind that many of the resources are geared towards the transformation of negative behaviors such as anger management, stress reduction, etc. Also, do not expect to be “cured” from the information provided on this website. The goal of the site is to set you up with a qualified professional aimed at helping you in your transformation. PsychologyToday.com

Udemy.com

There are free and paid courses available on Udemy.com. It is worth a look at some of the free courses and then you can decide to try paid ones after. At the time of this writing, there are 70+ free resources related to personal transformation. Source: https://www.udemy.com/courses/personal-development/personal-transformation/

Google

If you are looking for a topic or area for transformation, use an advanced Google search with the operator “inurl:”. This operator makes sure the phrase is within the URL, which means the website is targeting that phrase. For instance, if you wanted information on how to stop smoking, try:

Inurl:stop smoking

 

Who do you want to be?

 

Have you hit a roadblock?

If you are unhappy where you are in life, it could be you are not creating the right vision about yourself. Think back to recent thoughts you had. Were they negative thoughts or feelings like you’ve hit a roadblock?

Shift your focus to a life that you want or the person you want to become. If you want to have a life like an idol of yours, read about how that idol has become a success and use that as a guideline to help you accomplish something similar.

Create a positive image

When you create a positive image within your mind, it will set up neural pathways to help you reach your goals. The more you reinforce this mental image the more pathways will be created. If there is information available online that can help you with your vision, use it to your advantage.

When you have determined your vision and the steps to help you get there, continue imagining that vision. Do this daily. Your brain gets so used to this vision it becomes a subconscious process.

Tweak your plans

Of course, you can alter your plan or your vision. There may be something you thought you wanted, but as you progress, you find this isn’t the case. There is nothing wrong with that. If this happens, create another vision and move on from there. Your brain will form pathways for this new vision.

If your vision is fine but the plan is not getting you where you need to be, don’t be afraid to make changes. Plans are guidelines only. They can be changed as needed. This can happen as new information comes to light along the way, information which wasn’t available when you first started.

Tune out the naysayers

Be prepared for criticism while creating this new vision for yourself. It is yours and yours alone. People may not understand what you are trying to achieve. Hold to your beliefs and prove them wrong. Your critics are not the ones who have to live with the vision you make for yourself.

You will find when you reach your goals those same critics will suddenly be on your side. They will even claim to have been there for you all along. It’s annoying, but that is how people behave. Just move on with your vision and let them think whatever they want.

 

Helping your transformation

 

Get help

Your changes, or transformations, could be major and may take immense effort. Will you know what changes are needed and how to go about them? If not, you may consider finding someone who can help.

While hiring a professional coach may seem an obvious choice, it’s not the only choice. You may already know someone experienced who can help you. Perhaps you have kept in contact with a teacher you admired while in school. This teacher could serve as a mentor or at the very least, point you to qualified people who can help.

Don’t rule out friends and colleagues. There should be plenty of people in your own circles who can provide guidance with the changes you seek. If nothing else, they can provide moral support and encouragement.

Be cautious

While it’s okay to do research online, be cautious of the results. You’ll see plenty of self-proclaimed experts passing themselves off as coaches or mentors. Their fees will be hefty, but it may be unclear if they can help or have the proper credentials. When you see someone who you believe seems capable, try to find others who have worked with them. Seek out advice from your network of colleagues and friends.

Lookout for scams, which you’ll find plenty of in your search. Use the internet to see if any red flags pop up when searching for professionals. If there are a lot of results reporting these listings as scams, you should move on. If the listings you investigate don’t come up as scams, this does not mean they are in the clear. It could mean the listings are new. Many scammers will shut down one site when they get flagged for being a scammer. It’s difficult for law enforcement to keep up with these.

Is a guarantee offered?

Never pay for anything without knowing what you are going to get. Consider paying using PayPal as they offer some protection should the service not deliver what was promised. You have 45 days to make a claim. The scammers do not want a record of their activity, so you probably won’t get contested when you make the claim. Of course, it is highly likely the scammer won’t even allow the use of a payment processor such as PayPal. You should consider this a major red flag.

There is never a better time to begin your own transformation journey than right now. These tips should help get you on your way.

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Do You Need To Change Your Attitude

Change Your Attitude

Life hasn’t gone the way you had hoped. You don’t have the sorts of relationships you feel you deserve. You feel stuck in your same dead-end job, in a career you thought had some promise. But nothing has turned out as planned. You believe it just isn’t in your cards to have your dream life. However, what could be the problem is not having the right kind of attitude. You may want to explore changing your attitude and see if that doesn’t result in the improvements you seek for the life that you want.

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The first step is to figure out if your attitude could use some adjusting. Do you find people trying to avoid you? Do you have a negative, defeatist, or spoiled attitude? Do you find that you get set off by the smallest incidents? You may have just ignored what people have told you about your having a bad attitude.

Don’t Take the Blame for Everything

The next time you are involved in some incident that goes bad, ask yourself this question. Is this something that was my responsibility? Go through the scenario from the perspective of an outsider observing you. Was there anything you could have done differently that would have changed the result? Think back to what you said or did and see if you were the one responsible.

A quick temper will make a fool of you
— Bruce Lee

You shouldn’t take the blame for everything. If you reach within and discover that others were responsible, then hold them to it. Be honest with this assessment. Just make sure that you have ruled out yourself as the culprit before doing this. If there are some gray areas, be the better person, and be willing to give in a bit.

Accept Both Good and Bad

When you go through this exercise, you will find you are in the wrong more often than you realized. Frequently you tell yourself how things would be better if only “they” would change. Remember there is no use to carp and complain about the attitudes of others. You cannot control this and cannot change them. Once you understand this, you can take the steps necessary to make appropriate changes in yourself. 

Don’t focus solely on the negative parts of your life. Accept both the good and bad. Be proud of all the positive accomplishments in your life and expand on their scope. But be willing to work diligently on changing the negative ones.

Readjust Your Thinking

Changing your attitude is a process. As such, it will take some time to readjust your thinking. You identify that you are not always right and continuously try to do what is necessary to avoid those activities again. When you do avoid them in the future, make sure you recognize that as an achievement as this is an important piece of the process.

Expect that others will recognize your changes when you commit to making them. Your attitude will transform for the better just by going through the process described. You will live a happier more fulfilled life. You will make new friends much more easily, and your present relationships both at home or on the job will be more rewarding.  

For additional tips on how to change your attitude check out this post by Michael Hyatt How a Shift in Your Vocabulary Can Instantly Change Your Attitude